Emojis: More Than Just Playful Decorations in Texting
Some people can’t send a three-word text without decorating it. “Running late 😬”. “Sounds good 🙌”. “Sorry about earlier 🥲”. At first glance, this might read as padding or as a habit from someone who never quite left school. Yet, research suggests a deeper reason behind frequent emoji use.
Far from being mere embellishments, emojis often appear in messages from individuals who are paying close attention to how their words will be received. They recognize a subtle truth many texters miss: written warmth is fragile and can easily vanish for reasons unrelated to the sender’s true feelings.
What the study actually found
In December 2024, Simon Dubé and his team at the Kinsey Institute published a study in PLOS ONE that examined emoji use among 320 adults recruited via Mechanical Turk. Participants reported their emoji frequency when communicating with friends, family, and romantic partners. The researchers then compared these patterns against measures of attachment style and emotional intelligence.
The findings revealed that individuals with higher emotional intelligence tended to use more emojis with friends. Conversely, those with avoidant attachment styles—characterized by discomfort with closeness and reliance on others—used fewer emojis with both friends and romantic partners. Additionally, women used emojis more than men, but this difference was limited to interactions with friends and family.
It’s important to note this was a correlational study with a mostly white, educated, married, English-speaking American sample. Therefore, it cannot prove that emojis improve emotional intelligence or apply universally. Still, it offers valuable insight into who tends to reach for emojis and why.
Tone falls off a cliff in writing
Nearly two decades ago, Justin Kruger and colleagues conducted five experiments on email communication. They found that writers were confident their sarcasm and jokes would be understood, but readers often missed the intended tone. This gap was attributed to egocentrism: senders hear their own voice’s nuances, but readers see only flat text.
Punctuation can also subtly affect tone. In 2016, Danielle Gunraj and her team at Binghamton University demonstrated that a one-word reply like “Sure” or “Yup” felt less sincere when followed by a period in text messages—a nuance absent in handwritten notes. Interestingly, exclamation marks had the opposite effect, making messages feel warmer.
Thus, the period—a punctuation mark traditionally taught as correct—has unintentionally become a symbol of coldness on screens. This shift in digital communication norms happened naturally, much like spoken slang, often without people realizing they send chilly signals unwittingly.
What emojis are doing
Emojis restore some of the emotional cues lost in plain text. For example, a 🙂 after “sure” conveys the friendly tone or raised eyebrow that would be obvious in person. In this way, emoji users are performing “repair work” on messages, anticipating multiple interpretations of a word like “Fine” and clarifying their intended meaning.
Typically, this isn’t a calculated strategy but a habit developed by those who have been misread before and want to avoid confusion. This also explains the connection to avoidant attachment: people uncomfortable with closeness avoid broadcasting warmth unintentionally and keep messages straightforward and emotionally neutral to maintain distance.
Where it backfires
Emojis have their limits, especially in professional settings. In 2018, Ella Glikson, Arik Cheshin, and Gerben van Kleef conducted experiments involving 549 participants from 29 countries. They found that a smiley in a formal work email lowered perceptions of the sender’s competence. Recipients also responded with less detailed information. In contrast, a smiling photograph boosted both competence and friendliness.
A larger preregistered replication in 2023 with 847 participants added nuance: smileys did increase perceived warmth but still reduced perceived competence, regardless of whether the context was formal or casual.
The practical takeaway: emojis increase warmth but decrease authority. This trade-off is usually acceptable with close friends but can be costly in initial professional communications.
How to use any of this
When someone floods you with emojis, try to interpret it as attentiveness rather than immaturity. They are likely managing how their message feels to you—a thoughtful effort many texters don’t make.
If you’re a minimalist texter, recognize that your neutral messages may not arrive as neutral. A simple “Ok.” with a period might unintentionally convey coldness or finality. Adding just one character, such as an exclamation mark or emoji, can prevent unnecessary friction.
Match your tone to the channel: use warmth with friends and family, hold back in initial professional emails, and relax once a real relationship is established.
When something truly matters, stop texting. Tone repair has limits, and complex conversations compressed into a phone screen often cause misunderstandings. Instead, opt for a phone call.
And when in doubt, ask directly. A simple “Are you annoyed with me?” costs one message but can save days of uncertainty. Most people will appreciate the question and respond honestly.
